


Oliver at Camp Abenaki

by BarkingBard



Category: Call Me By Your Name (2017), Call Me By Your Name - All Media Types, Call Me by Your Name - André Aciman
Genre: Angst, M/M, Philosophy, Poker Nights, Prequel, Slow Burn, Summer Camp, greek philosophy - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-06
Updated: 2018-05-12
Packaged: 2019-05-02 23:45:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14556183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BarkingBard/pseuds/BarkingBard
Summary: Oliver’s parents had decided that they ‘need’ to take a cruise, so they give him the option of going to summer camp or staying with his cousins. Neither are very attractive options but his cousins are insufferable. He isn’t sure how ‘Camp Abenaki’ was chosen, but availability at short notice would have been the main factor. He is fourteen, awkward and much taller than the rest of the boys, which makes him feel even more obvious. He is hoping that during his stay he will be uninterrupted and get some reading in.Little does Oliver know that his time at ‘Camp Abenaki’ will change his life’s trajectory forever. His bunk mate puts a stop to any quiet time. Alex with his endless babbling, his dark Mediterranean coloring and his nose of a classical sculpture. His people marauded across the known world since antiquity. He will conquer the unsuspecting Oliver with his book smarts and poker skills that he never knew he needed until Alex entered his world.





	1. Books and Tells

Oliver was left standing in a cloud of dust. To his surprise his parents had retreated to the car and drove off without any hesitation. He stood awkwardly with his rucksack and pillow. In the last month he had grown more than a foot and this coupled with his shining blond hair made him stand out like a lighthouse in the middle of the maelstrom of people. Parents and boys were streaming into the campsite towards the cabins encircling a flagpole, the noise was deafening and Oliver wanted to disappear but sadly was too conspicuous. He was fourteen, awkward and didn’t like crowds.

Sulkily he slung his bag over his shoulder, as made his way for cabin 23. This place would be his home for the next two weeks. The interior was a cacophony of wood; worn, scuffed and very tired-looking. He flung his bag into the bottom bunk of a vacant bed and then dove in after it. He opened his book and hoped no one would bother him until dinner time. People came and went and his book kept him adequately occupied. The others placed their backpacks and pillows and jackets and shoes on the other beds in the room to mark their ownership.

After a while the people drifted off and left Oliver on his bunk in silence. The door of the cabin flew open with a loud bang. In the doorway was a smallish boy dragging a heavy bag, scraping his way over the floor. What did he have in there, a body? Oliver went back to his book but kept one eye on the boy. He searched the room for a spare bunk and quickly came to the realisation that the only bunk left was above Oliver’s bunk. Oliver tried to dissolve into his book.

“Hey, look, do you mind switching bunks?” he said to Oliver. “I get altitude sickness!”

Oliver tried to ignore him and pretended not to hear him.

The boy kicked his shoe. “Hey!”

Oliver looked up from his book.

“Do you mind switching bunks? I won’t be able to sleep if I am so far off the ground.”

Oliver looked the boy over and decided to acquiesce. Without a word he picked up his bag and pillow and slung it up to the top bunk. He took the couple of steps up the ladder and snuggled into the new space.

“You are too kind!” He beamed, “I am Alexander by the way, but you can call me Alex.”

Alex stuck out his hand. But to shake it would have forced Oliver to reach down from his new bunk. And that wasn’t going to happen, so Oliver just looked blankly at the out stretched hand and then went back to his book. Alex took his hanging hand and ran it through his hair awkwardly. Oliver smirked at this.

For all of Oliver’s lankiness, fair hair and reserved nature, Alex was his antithesis. He was short, dark and talkative. He wore clothes that were too large for his body so you couldn’t really see him under their bagginess. He obviously was the younger of older brothers. Alex had that Mediterranean colouring, dark eyes and the nose of a classical sculpture. His people had marauded across the known world since antiquity. His namesake had conquered as far as India. Alex conquered through charm and a barge of conversation.

In Oliver’s vacuum Alex filled the space with words, so so many words. His journey wasn’t too hard. This was his third year at ‘Camp Abenaki’. It wasn’t much fun but at least there was always something going on. Within ten minutes Oliver knew what he thought was Alex’s life story. It was rather exhausting listening to him. ‘Does this kid ever shut up?’ Oliver thought to himself.

“I’m going back to my book now!” Oliver mumbled. Midsentence Alex stopped and walked away.

With a sigh of relief Oliver realised this was going to be a very long two weeks.

***

Oliver’s parents ‘needed’ to take a cruise, so they gave him the option of going to camp or staying with his cousins. Neither was a very attractive option but his cousins were insufferable. Too many of them, too much noise and way too girlie. He wasn’t sure how ‘Camp Abenaki’ was chosen for him, but its availability at short notice would have been the main factor. It definitely wasn’t for the extensive library that the camp obviously did not possess. His parents felt he needed to get outside more. Stop brooding over books and talk to more people. It wasn’t healthy the amount of time he spent alone. Or so he had heard his Mother say to his Father, when they thought he was out of ear shot. He had tried to argue that he was old enough to stay home alone but when both parents were on his case, he knew he was going to have to comply. God, it sucked to be him.

The first evening meal was tolerable. The food was welcome and filling. He sat at a table with other boys who looked like they didn’t fit anywhere. All braces, wheezing and awkward sweaty patches. Oliver wasn’t one of these boys. He was tall, lath and handsome. Not that he could see it in himself. People were struck by his piercing blue eyes and intelligence. He made people comfortable with his quiet ways. His teachers valued his dedication to his work and insights that were well above his year level. His intellect would see him graduate two years early from High School. Sadly, this quietness was not valued by his class mates who found him distant and a swat. 

His critical internal dialogue was the voices of his parents. He couldn’t help but see himself through their eyes. Slow, unresponsive and anti-social. He took up too much space. His shoes kept shrinking and his trousers kept getting shorter. His mother would attack him every time he came out of his room for already growing out of his new clothes. Her last purchases were never big enough. She always bought several sizes too big, but no matter how large, he would soon be in pants too short for him. It was like throwing good money after bad, she would say. He was exhausted just listening to the barrage.

On the first night he lay in his bunk listening to the snores, groans and murmuring of his cabin mates. He heard Alex below him; he didn’t even shut up in his sleep. Why wasn’t he surprised? He put his pillow over his head.

He was quite proud that he had so far managed to get out of doing anything outside. He had avoided talking to people and had avoided the large groups of popular kids. Another big bonus was that he had gotten through a large chunk of his book. With any luck he could keep this up for the full two weeks. And this is what he thought of as he drifted off into an unsettled sleep.

***

In the darkened cabin, he woke to sudden excruciating pain of leg cramps. They had been increasing in intensity in the last few months. The pain felt like he had been hit by a metal bar. He lay there in shock, writhing in pain. Barely able to breathe, all he could do was let out a kind of whimper. He hoped that he wasn’t going to wake the cabin.

Out of nowhere he felt two strong hands on his legs, massaging his calves and slowly relieving the pain. As soon as he was released from the spasms, he was left with an equally painful dull ache. Alex spoke softly near his head. “Do you think you can walk?” 

He slid down from his bunk with a small thump. With his arm around Alex’s shoulders, they left the cabin and began to in walk circles. As they walked each step got easier. “You are growing too fast! Your muscles can’t keep up with your bones!”

“Thanks Mom” Oliver says facetiously.

“My Father is doctor, he knows about these things. I have seen picture in his medical books.”

Oliver just nodded.

Alex started talking to distract him from the pain, “You really don’t want to be here, do you?”

Oliver let out a sign. And thought ‘Here we go’.

“I watched you at dinner, and then you disappeared before the camp fire. It’s not so bad here you know. There are loads of things to do. Sports, swimming, a poker game always going on somewhere. Someone with a radio or adult books to swap, I have a bag full of things to swap. You just need to know where to look. The camp staff don’t really care what we do as long as we don’t bother them.” 

“The other camp I went to a couple of years ago was much worse. People would beat you up if you looked at them the wrong way. Apparently I have a ‘smart mouth’. My Mother had to come down to save me from that place. She threated to sue them for neglect. She is a crack lawyer, you know.”

“I think you should take up jogging. It will help you stretch out your leg muscles. If you do it every day, you won’t get leg cramps and won’t wake me up.’ He punched Oliver playfully in his arm.

“I am going jogging tomorrow morning if you want to join me.”

Oliver shrugged as they both walked back towards the cabin. He was tired but his legs felt much better for walking.

He must have been asleep for a few hours but it felt like seconds before he was woken by Alex. It was still dark outside, with only a small patch of yellow in the east. Begrudgingly, Oliver slid down and got dressed in shorts and a t-shirt. His sneakers were new and a little too tight already but this was the best he had to wear. He was much too groggy to argue with his bunk mate.

They stretched against a tree before jogging down a track into the dense woods. Alex instructed him in the method to ensure his muscles were warmed up sufficiently. His Dad had taught him. Oliver knew his Dad was a doctor. He felt he had learnt way too much about this Alex kid and his family already.

When they started jogging Oliver could tell Alex was taking it easy on him. He talked as fast as the thudding of their feet. Like a drum beat in a slave galley and it with almost as torturous. Oliver knew he would not get any peace from Alex’s incessant babble until he upped his pace. Alex was much fitter than he appeared. His muscles burned and his breath was coming out is short puffs. Alex continued discussing the type of trees and the uses of saps in medicine. His breath was starting to increase and his words shortened. Oliver needed to increase his pace further. He knew he wouldn’t be able to keep up this pace for long but wondered how long it would take. “Dude, are you trying to kill me!” Alex moaned. He slumped himself on the ground. Oliver leant against a large tree. ‘Quiet at last’.

Just then the sun came over the surrounding hills, the orb reflected in the water shimmering and dancing across the ripples of the lake. Silence and a moment’s peace; it was magical. His body ached, his breath came out of him in hot bursts but he felt fully awake and the most alive that he had felt in years.

Their morning run became entrenched into a daily ritual that Oliver started excitedly anticipating. Each day Alex would try his best to encourage Oliver to come out of his shell. He ‘tried’ to give him room to talk. He didn’t have much success and so often gave up and filled the space with whatever was going through his mind. The important thing for Oliver was he stopped getting leg cramps and he could stop for a few minutes to just sit in silence by the lake. He liked to stare out over the water. The world seemed so much more manageable after his run and even Alex’s chatter wasn’t as bad as it was after he could just sit and absorb his spot. Alex would pant but he was doing the same and so he didn’t hear it. 

After a few minutes of sitting looking at the view, Oliver caught himself looking to see if he could make out Alex’s shape as he panted on the ground. He was in pretty good shape under his baggy clothes. Alex caught his eye and gave him the most unfathomable look. It was like he was daring Oliver to look at him. Oliver felt exposed and awkward and got back up to his feet. He jogged off down the path. He felt himself blushing but was already red from their exertion. Alex called after him but Oliver increased his pace and didn’t look back.

***

One evening Alex burst into the cabin and grabbed Oliver’s foot. “Oliver, I need you! We are short for poker. I am on a killer streak and you need to play so they don’t quit and I can clean up!”

“I don’t play poker!” he replied as he put his book down.

“I can teach you. It will be great!!” Oliver shrugged in agreement. He knew Alex would pester him until he did what he wanted him to do. So why argue?

In a cabin a few doors over was a table and a group of boys all hunched over a pack of cards. There was much excitement and chatter in the room. Oliver’s natural response was to run at this much noise, but Alex pushed him through the door. Oliver sat opposite Alex in the seat just vacated by an angry-looking boy. “Good luck against him tonight!” Oliver’s eyes were wide as saucers – what did he mean? He was a babe in the woods and Alex was the big bad wolf.

The fast-paced explanations of ‘how to play poker’ that Alex had given him as they walked over to the game were woefully inadequate. Oliver was terrible. Embarrassingly so. He threw out good cards and didn’t play a royal straight when he had one, which caused the manic crowd to erupt in screams and whistles. What had Alex got him into? The rounds were fast and much too much for Oliver to understand. He wanted to cry.

Alex was in his element and brilliant. He was like a mind reader. He hammered the other players. He was like a true shark. Alex took it relatively easy on Oliver. He still ended the night with not a dime left on him. Alex gloated as they walked back to their own cabin. He had won $30. Oliver couldn’t believe how good he was at poker and how he could make that much money in one night. He needed to know how he did it.

The following morning during their run, they sat overlooking the lake. Oliver asked him the simple question, ‘How did you know what the other players were thinking?” A smile washed over Alex’s face.

Like an avalanche, Alex unloaded his theories on Oliver. He sat in dumbstruck awe. He explained it coming down to looking for ‘tells’. Every player has several ‘tells’, and will give away what’s in his hand. Once you put together how someone will behave when they hold certain cards, you have them. They can try to cover it up and bluff but once you see the guy do a couple of ‘tells’ he may as well be playing with his cards face-up.

“You are terrible at poker by the way. You are not just clueless; your face is like an open book. Each emotion flows over it like the weather!” Oliver’s face flushed red, as if Alex had slapped him. “There you go…. You are embarrassed and angry at the same time. Embarrassed that you can’t play and angry that I am telling you this, like I think I know you!” Alex blurted out.

Oliver stood up, he felt so exposed he wanted to punch him. “Hey... Hey, calm down big guy. You have much to learn, and I can help!”

Alex’s annoying patronising tone infuriated him and he wanted to run away! But he couldn’t leave this here. He was rigid with rage and let Alex have it. A week of Alex’s incessant babble bubbled over in him. “If you are so good at reading people, why are you such a little shit?!” Alex was shocked to get such a reaction and beamed with pride. It looked like Oliver was beginning to open up. 

***

Two days later (once he had calmed down), Oliver woke Alex to go for their morning run. He had rationalised how annoying Alex was, against how much he could teach him. Oliver couldn’t put his finger on why he was so intrigued by this annoying boy. He wouldn’t admit to himself that there was something more than his justifications. There was something about Alex that got under his skin. So Oliver decided to explain it away. Alex was always up to something. He knew so much about the world. He also could make money from reading people’s faces. Oliver envied him that. He didn’t like to even look at people let alone into their faces to read their ‘tells’. Maybe he needed to start working on this.

Alex continued his poker lessons during their morning jog. There are five simple ‘tells’ which are seen in the eyes; the hands and how they handle their card and chips; the timing of their play; their attentiveness to the play and finally the way they chatter during play. Each round these five points will vary depending on the cards in his hand. If you play long enough you will be able to learn each player’s ‘tells’. Oliver could tell it wasn’t this easy but Alex had him enthralled. Alex loved having Oliver’s complete attention. He went on with his theories until lunch. For the first time they sat together for lunch. Alex moved a couple of boys down his usual table and Oliver recognised them from the game the other night. One of the boys looked very angry with Alex – he obviously had lost a lot of money to him. Oliver studied each boy’s face for ‘tells’. There was so much going on at this table that his head began to spin. Alex had opened a whole new world to him that only a few hours ago he would have been oblivious to. He didn’t understand many of the ‘tells’ he was seeing but the point was he was noticing them.

Oliver was so caught up he didn’t notice that Alex was talking to him. With a shove he said. “As Epicurus said, “We should look for someone to eat and drink with before looking for something to eat and drink.”

“What is an Ep-ee-Curus?” Oliver asked totally at a loss.

Laughing as he replied, “Were you raised by wolves?” Alex became serious again, “Epicurus was an ancient Greek Philosopher who thought life was all about trying to attain happiness and a tranquil life, characterized by ‘ataraxia’ or the absence of pain. This is achieved by living self-sufficiently and surrounded by friends.” Alex calmly replied

“Ooookay… and your point?”

“You have been living an unbalanced life. Hiding from your real feeling by having your nose in books and no one to share what you are learning with. I think you parents were right in sending you to camp. I have decided I need to teach you how to live!”

Oliver couldn’t believe that he was having this conversation at the lunch table. He was glad that the rest of the table wasn’t paying any attention to the conversation and was busy inhaling sandwiches. It was like feeding time at the zoo. Oliver was feeling incredibly uneasy with Alex taking him on as a charity case. Who does he think he is? Oliver didn’t believe he needed fixing. Alex and his pal Epi-what’s-his-name could go and get stuffed. Oliver didn’t say it but he knew that Alex could read his annoyance.

***

Later in the day Alex decided that they needed to practice his reading of ‘tells’. Oliver wasn’t in a mood to argue. Alex had worn him down again. He was rather exhausting to be with.

His training included an hour at the volleyball court, picking apart the plays and the strategies being used by the teams in association to their facial expression. Oliver thought his ears would bleed from Alex’s incessant commentary.

When they went back to their cabin to practise with the cards. Alex held up a single card.

“What do I have?”

“A card!”

“No shit, what is it?”

One of Alex’s eye brows went up. It’s high, Oliver thought. How high? Alex’s smirk was trying to cover for something. Oliver had him.

“It’s a king,” Oliver declared. The king of spades smiled benignly at him for Alex’s card. “Good job!” Oliver beamed triumphantly. They continued to stare into each other’s faces for a moment too long.

Alex broke the silence. “Don’t get too cocky, you were just lucky!”

‘That’s it’ he thought. He was over it and the monologue and this was getting way too intense. His body told him he needed to swim. 

He got up and collected his towel and kicked off his shoes. Alex followed him to the water’s edge but didn’t follow him in; he just continued to talk at him from the shore. There was a light breeze but the water was as warm as a bath. His body relaxed the instant it was submerged, revelling in the sensation of the water against his body. When he dove under the water it effectively blocking out Alex’s voice, particularly when he dove deep under the water. It’s a pity he couldn’t hold his breath for longer. He so would have liked more time in this quiet peaceful place. But he knew he couldn’t live too long in this dream world without air.


	2. In camera

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The last week of Oliver's time at 'Camp Anenaki'. Oliver will be forever transfigured by his friendship with the infuriating and beguiling Alex. The conclusion to this prequel.

A new day brought another run and the most magnificent sunrise. No matter how much Oliver complained to himself about Alex, he was going to miss his company when this camp was over. Alex had a way of engaging Oliver in everything he did. Even the most boring and mundane tasks could become an enthralling eye-opening experience under Alex’s tuition. Oliver could never figure out what Alex would do next, and this excitement was infectious.

Sometimes Alex would meet people for a swim or for a few furious hands of poker. The most intense times for Oliver were the ones where they stayed in their cabin reading. Apparently, Alex needed some ‘quiet time’; or more accurately, relatively ‘quiet time’. He came to realise that Alex was trying to make an excuse to spend more time alone with him and talk about things. Alex knew that Oliver preferred to hide in their cabin to anything else at the camp.

So much for Alex’s ‘quiet time’! One day he was explaining in detail how his father had challenged him to read the pre-Socratic philosophers. While he talked he was thumbing through a well-worn paperback of Greek philosophy.

“The Ancient Greeks had it all worked out. I mean everything. Science, law, art, democracy and then the world lost it,” he said with a certain pride that comes from feeling connected to a certain group of people. “My Greek isn’t very good and so I have to read English translations but one day I will be able to read the original texts."

Oliver found his theory on Greek universal intelligence hard to believe and his face must have showed it. Alex opened the book at what appeared to be a random page; he must have marked it somehow. Did he also know ‘sleight of hand’ tricks??

“So this guy, Heraclitus said – ‘The content of your character is your choice. Day by day, what you choose, what you think and what you do is who you become.’ This is the best self-help book ever.”

He chuckled to himself. He knew he had Oliver’s full attention again. “You create your own fate and future. Each decision no matter how small is making your future and your future self. Nothing is permanent and everything is forever changing.”

“My Dad explained it as pre-Socratic philosophers being the most important foundation to understanding modern science. So, I think you would find reading early Greek philosophy rewarding.”

He threw his copy to Oliver. Turning the book over in his hands, Oliver opened at a random page and he began to read. The rest of his reading during camp was now written off to completing this book. As he read his eyes were becoming as wide as saucers. He had been introduced to a world that would rewrite his internal landscape and would take over his professional life. Of course he didn’t know the impact that this small book would have on him and his future self, but Heraclitus would have been amused at his impact on Oliver.

 ***

Oliver watched intently the poker players around the table in their cabin each night. Alex decided to host most of the games and give Oliver a splendid view from his top bunk. It was the perfect positon for him to be in. He could watch everything, didn’t have to interact with anyone and no one noticed what he was doing. He was slowly getting used to the raucous crowd and learnt to read the impact of the audience on the players. Ego was as big a ‘tell’ as the faces players pulled.

As the night’s play wore on, he would feel more confident and start to play a few hands. As the week progressed Oliver began to come out with increasing amounts of small change in his pocket. Alex was impressed and said that he now didn’t ‘totally suck’!  Oliver beamed at his friend’s compliment.

They ate all their meals together and discussed what each other had been reading that day. As Oliver read more of the philosophy book, he felt more confident to argue with Alex as he was often too simplistic in his interpretations of some of the important theories. Oliver was a much more thoughtful reader and Alex had to concede more and more points to him. He may have created a monster in handing over his books. Oliver was disciplined and concise in his interpretation. Alex was impassioned, capricious and inconsistent. His mercurial nature directly impacted his arguments. Oliver was considered, methodical and astute in his thinking and interpretations. Their minds complemented each other’s perfectly and made for some heated disputes, which alienated the other members of their table. They couldn’t care less as they were not looking for any interjection into their duopolistic philosophical world.

***

The penultimate day of the camp saw the Camp Leaders organise ‘The Great Hike’. It would be a day- long hike and sadly it wasn’t optional. Oliver would have rather stayed in his bunk with his books but he was not given an option. It wasn’t just _‘The Man’_ that was pushing him to go. Alex was obsessed with it. “It’s so much fun. The view from the top of the hills is something that you need to see at least once in your life.

 With all their jogging he wasn’t afraid of exerting himself; in fact he had never been more physically prepared. The thing that irked him was that he had spent enough time with Alex to know he was scheming something. He would have to go along with him to find out what he was up to.

They set off with bags full of enough food, snacks and water for the day. The stream of boys trudged slowly along the trail without an idea where they were going. The conversations were lively and spontaneous. Oliver was surprised to find he was enjoying watching how the paths varied in width and caused the other hikers to form natural groups, which would be dispersed as the path narrowed again. His usual dinner table group was spread out over a few hundred yards and when they hit the top of a ridge the stream of boys formed a multi-colored serpent running along the hillside.

They were nowhere near their destination but many of the boys were beginning to tire and fall behind or just dawdle. The Camp leaders did their best to keep them together but of course with so many boys to monitor and all with such different levels of fitness they couldn’t keep track of every boy. They had arrived at a section of very dense trees and bushes. Alex elbowed Oliver in the ribs and gestured for him to follow him off the path and through a thicket. It was a more overgrown path heading away from the direction that the other hikers where heading. Oliver looked to the Camp leaders to see if they would be noticed taking a little detour. He realised that none was looking and would be safe to follow Alex. Upping his pace, he soon caught up with Alex. He dutifully followed him into the woods, more out of curiosity than obedience.

Alex didn’t say anything until they couldn’t hear the other campers anymore. Their path was steeper, more overgrown and rockier than the other path they had been following with the main group. Oliver was cautious to try not to rub himself against the bushes flanking the path for fear of poison oak or poison ivy. Hopefully Alex’s Dad had shown him which plants to avoid because he had no idea. And where were they going?

After 20 minutes they came to a clearing of sorts that led down to a river. The two friends walked along the water’s edge. The sound of crashing water could be heard before they could see the source. As they came around a bend the river began to widen, which became a deep clear pool at the base of waterfall. The sun bounced off every surface, making the narrow ravine sparkle. It was idyllic and totally secluded. Alex beamed at Oliver; this was where he was bringing him. His joy was infectious.

After walking through the dense woods for so long, the water beckoned to them. It looked cool and refreshing. They were almost running towards the pool, caught up in the dream and entranced by this beautiful place. The moist and primal crevice was overflowing with sweet pristine water. This was the nearest thing that Oliver had ever seen to heaven on earth. Even though they were hot and thirsty they clambered over rocks and boulders trying to get to the water as quickly as possible, undressing as they went and discarding their possessions in their wake. Shoes and socks and bags and shirts were like a trail of debris leading the way to the point that they found themselves panting at the pool’s edge.

Taking Oliver’s hand, Alex marched out into the water. It felt natural to both go in together; they had come so far together. The water was cold but so refreshing after the hiking. They splashed and swam in the pool until their skin thickened with goose bumps and their teeth began chattering. Shifting from the water they recharged their energy by draping themselves over boulders hot from the bright sunshine. 

“Will you write me?” Alex finally asked.

Oliver responded without really thinking about it. “Sure!”

Alex smiled at this.

“I will miss you after we leave camp.”

Oliver had tried not to think about life after camp. His own life was usually so dull and secluded. How was it going to be back in the real world without his friend to pester him into things. He shivered at the thought of their parting tomorrow and clung tighter to his rock. His heart ached at this conversation and so he didn’t reply.

***

When they had warmed up enough they drifted along the pool’s edge investigating the assortment of flotsam and jetsam that had collected between the rocks. The smooth boulders changed colour under their wet feet, leaving a temporary trails of their path in this magical place.

 When they reached the cliff face the sun shined through the falling water and the glittering light enclosed them both. Oliver leant up against the rocky wall silently in awe of the sights in front of him. Midsentence Alex stopped and turned to Oliver. He stepped in closer and reached out for his face. Conveying the most complex expression, he pulled Oliver’s head down to meet his own at their lips. Oliver was stunned at the warmth of the gesture. Their kiss deepened, their bodies naturally entwined around each other. Oliver’s heart began to pound and he stiffened. Hands were moving like they had minds of their own. The excitement built and Oliver became more forceful with increased vigour. The cloth front of his yellow swimming trunks became taut against his engorged flesh. He was totally in this kiss and there was no stopping the passion that was driving him to caress Alex’s body. The world seemed to slow around them to take in this moment – just two hearts trying to become one. The waterfall seamed to disappear and the forest became endless.

Grinding up against Alex with increasing urgency Oliver’s body was no longer his. It belonged to his heart, the blood in his veins and a pounding force he was about to release. A deep groan filled his ears as his body released the tension from his groin. He unleashed his universal juice that he had been concealing since the day he had reached puberty.

In a moment Oliver felt a sheet of ice, cold and sharp, slice through him like a guillotine. The warmth and passion of moments ago was gone and he was crushed by a wave of nausea. He came back into his body with a feeling of regret. What seemed so natural and inevitable a few moments ago now felt dirty and sordid. He was embarrassed and all he knew was he had to get away. Away from this boy, away from this disgusting place and away from what he had just done in the front of his trunks.

“We can’t do this!”  Oliver announces as he pushed away from Alex’s embrace. Had he noticed his trunks?

“We have to be good!”

“We haven’t done anything to feel ashamed of. No one will know?” Alex whispered with shock in his voice.

Reaching out for Oliver to return to the warmth of the embrace that they had both had just enjoyed. Oliver stumbled away, manically fumbling around and tripping over the rocks in searched of his possessions.  Alex called after him but he didn’t turn around. He was in full flight. He was casting himself out of Eden.

Oliver’s lips stung from where Alex kissed him and across his body he could feel everywhere he had been touched by him. Why was he feeling like this? Had Alex scarred him with his touch? Why had he followed him and not stayed on the main trail with all the other campers? He wanted to be normal. He wanted to be just like everyone else. What would his parents say if they found out?

He was running hard along the track pounding the path to return to the world he knew.  Oliver was trying to outrun his feelings for Alex. His head was spinning as he began to tire. As he slowed his pace, Oliver resolved in himself how he would proceed. He would not discuss this with any one, most of all Alex. He would go back to doing what he was doing before coming to the camp and no one would have to know his secret. No one would know how excited he had gotten from that kiss. Why did kissing Alex quicken his body so? He was sure that there must be something wrong with him. He could overcome this weakness?

By the time he got back to camp the other campers were streaming back in. Some were lying around exhausted on the ground or in bunks; they didn’t pay any attention to him. They didn’t notice or care about his distress. He threw himself into the shower block and scrubbed away at his shame. His favourite yellow trunks would never be worn again. They would be lost in the process of packing up and discarded. He would focus his anger at them; if he hadn’t been swimming with Alex, all this would never have happened. He would have had no regrets.

Oliver went to bed early but he wasn’t really sleeping – he was hiding. There were so many things to hide from, to cover up and to try to forget happened. Alex didn’t return until very late. No one noticed his absence except Oliver. He was relieved to not have to look at him or talk to him. He knew that Alex would want to talk. He always wanted to talk about everything. He would go on into great detail about everything. He would want to discuss what happened. Oliver couldn’t risk it. What if he got the urge to kiss Alex again? The two of them being alone had to be avoided at all costs!

The sun was barely up when Oliver felt Alex grab his leg. “It’s time to go running?”

Oliver rolled over and pretended to still be asleep. He mumbled, “Later.” into his pillow.

He hadn’t slept much during the night. He had just lay in his bunk bed and listened to Alex breathe. Alex was now touching him and his heart began to beat faster. He was sure everyone in the room could hear it beating. His groin bounced with expectation at the touch. ‘Stupid body!’ he thought.

 After a few moments Alex got the hint and left the cabin as usual. Once he was gone, Oliver panicked. His parents would be here to collect him soon; he just needed to find a way to disappear until they arrived. He had little time to pack up and he was out of the cabin and hiding from view when Alex returned. He watched him return with a red face from his run but his eyes were puffy and it was obvious he had been crying. The sight hurt Oliver more than he thought it would. Oliver felt guilty at his friend being upset but was not able to resolve how to alleviate his anguish.

Resolving that Alex would be much better off without Oliver in his life, he tried to evaporate. Alex would forget him and no harm would have been done. He would put him out of his mind and no one would ever need to know. It was the only way. He felt guilty about it but what could he do?

When Oliver’s father arrived to collect him, he was greeted by a healthier looking boy. His father was shocked to see that he had grown further. When would he ever stop growing? He let out a sigh.

Oliver slung his rucksack and pillow into the trunk of the car without being prompted and his father shook his hand in greeting. His mother was having ‘one of her headaches’ and didn’t come down, so it was going to be a long silent drive home. This perfectly suited Oliver’s somber mood.

He swung himself into the seat next to his father and slammed the door. Oliver could have sworn he heard someone call his name, but he didn’t try to look to see if he had been called. He was going back to his old life; he couldn’t look back. His father spun the tyres on the loose gravel. Floating on a wave of nerves and nausea, he was being shuttled back into the world. His lips were stinging, hot and sore like he had been tattooed by that illicit kiss. He was a marked man. He was sure everyone could tell what happened at the waterfall. Oliver was changed. The young man who would return from ‘Camp Abenaki’ would be forever transfigured by these eventful two weeks. He dedicated himself into his studies and tried to forget about his infuriating and beguiling friend Alex.

“We are shaped and fashioned by what we love.” - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry there isn't a happy ending for these two. As a prequel, I needed things to not work out for the boys but to give Oliver some structure and milestones to lead him to Northern Italy in 1987 (or 1983 in the movie).
> 
> I hope you have enjoyed this little visit into Oliver's youth. Your thoughts and opinions are more than welcome.
> 
> Chapter tile: 'In camera' from the 1944 existentialist French play by Jean-Paul Sartre.

**Author's Note:**

> I adore André Aciman’s book but find Elio Perlman to be such an unreliable narrator. His view of his great love is so flawed and tainted by his own feelings and insecurities. Oliver doesn’t even get given a last name. What you get is Oliver’s voice, actions and life; heavily edited, truncated, filtered and reconstructed through Elio’s gaze. Mind you it doesn’t stop you adoring Oliver. I am totally an Oliver fan and I think he deserves some fleshing out.
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> My intention with this prequel is to begin to explain how a shy and intelligent man can walk through the world with a poker face of confidence and ease. These are learned skills to protect him from a harsh upbringing and as method of hiding the things in his personality that he finds uncomfortable. I hope you will excuse my indulgence. I am sorry there is not happy ending in this but he needed to be free to travel his journey to Elio. I have tried to imply that Oliver has a type of man that he goes for and so he falls for a ethnically Greek boy in this story.
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> I have tried to limit my own colloquial language but there are a couple of lines that I couldn’t resist. I think I have managed a fair American twang to the dialogue. I humbly apologise for any obvious errors in language.
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> My knowledge of summer camps is limited to dodgy 1980’s movies, so if I have it totally wrong, I am sorry for that too. The camp is less important than giving Oliver and Alex a space to meet and flesh out their friendship.
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> The name ‘Abenaki’ comes from the Native American tribe who ranged from Maine and Southern Quebec, encompassing New England. Sadly, the language of ‘Abenaki’ is now extinct. I thought it was fitting to juxtapose it against the other dead language Latin which will influence Oliver’s future career.
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> Your thoughts and opinions on this short work are more than welcome.
> 
> There has been some plagiarism of original work from this site and posting else where under different names. If you use my words be respectful and credit my labour. If you come across this work elsewhere please let me know. Now, if you want to steal this, that's a different matter... I WILL hunt you down and break your kneecaps! :)


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